How to start a Social Anxiety Anonymous / Social Phobics Anonymous Support Group: Some Helpful Tips
When the darkness comes for me, I will light a match.
With that match, I will light a torch.
With that torch, I will light the way for others.
Together, we will find the new day.
It is through helping our fellow social anxiety sufferers that we ourselves are set free from our own anxiety problems.
We have found that there is a kind of spiritual principle at work here-- there is something about helping others (especially helping those with the same problems that we have) that heals us as we do the helping.
In any case, here are 12 simple steps to starting an SPA support group that you may find useful (you might want to print this out):
1) If you start an SPA group we will list it for free on our web page (if you like) so that people can find out about it.
2) Find a centrally located meeting place. Churches or Synagogues often let support groups meet in their basements. You can also try hospitals, libraries, community centers, schools or universities. You may have to call a lot of places because many groups use these spaces, but if you keep at it you shouldn't have too much trouble finding a meeting space. If possible, find a place with free or inexpensive parking in a well lit area.
Some of these places require a small 'rent' of a few dollars a week or a month. If so, these places will usually lower the rent or even drop it to zero if you explain that you are starting a new group and won't have a lot of people in the beginning.
The recommended way to pay for a room 'rental' is to take a collection at every meeting (pass the hat or the basket and people throw in a dollar or two or whatever they can). This usually covers the rent. Important-- Always make it clear that nobody has to donate if they don't want to. There should be no pressure about donations-- only the the love and understanding of the fellowship.
3) Set a meeting time and keep to it faithfully. We suggest that you meet every week at exactly the same time. The reason is, if the time varies (or if you meet less than once a week) people will get confused about whether or not your meeting is 'on' or not this time around and they will tend not to come rather than waste a trip.
Be sure to be on time for the meeting and stay for the whole meeting time, even if no one else comes in the beginning. (Sometimes a new person will get lost on their first visit to your group and they might show up late-- even in the last 5 minutes of the meeting, so just be patient and wait through the whole meeting time so that you can greet all newcomers and make them feel at home).
This will help your group to grow and help it meet that critical mass where it becomes a self-perpetuating support group, no longer dependent on you.
4) Advertise the support group meeting on an ongoing basis. **Very Important** Support groups rarely last very long by word of mouth alone. A regular ad in a newspaper is essential to the success of a local (face-to-face support group). However the good news is, you can often get this advertising for free or cheap. First, try calling the 'Calendar' department of your local Newspapers, they often list support groups for free.
A few flyers or an occasional ad won't cut it. Sporadic efforts that don't reach a large number of people generally won't create the consistent attendence by newcomers needed to build and then sustain the support group.
Also important-- Whichever way you get your ad listed, be sure to run it at least 3 times a month (month after month-- year round). We have found that just running one ad a month-- or running occasional ads-- will almost never generate enough of a consistent response to build a sustained and ongoing SPA support group. Consistent advertising is key (although it often doesn't have to be expensive).
How To Advertise the group for free or (usually) inexpensively: If your city or town calendar section won't list your group for free, then try getting a classified ad. These are often not very expensive. If you can't afford the Sunday section, then try a weekly edition (weekly ads are often cheaper). Note-- if you live in major urban areas you may find that there is no way to avoiding paying a bit more for a an ongoing classified ad, even in the weekday sections.
Consider the cost of doing nothing. Keep in mind that the relatively small investment of time and money in starting a SPA support group is very much worth it. Ask yourself what the elimination of your social anxiety problems is worth to you personally.
Compare this to the 'opportunity costs' of missing out on the recovery from social anxiety that the SPA support group can provide-- a continuation of miserable anxiety symptoms, possibly for years to come, continued reduced quality of life, lost or strained relationships with friends and family, lost job or educational opportunities and perhaps the lost opportunity to ever develop an intimate and meaningful relationship with that special someone (or the undermining of the quality of an existing intimate relationship). In light of this, many of us with anxiety disorders have decided that the small time and expense required to start an SPA group is far outweighed by the benefits.
5) Get the books. Once you have the recommended SPA books, we suggest that the first 1/3 of the meeting time be spent reading from the books to the group.
6) You do not have to have recovered from social anxiety yet yourself and you do not have to understand the books yet either to start a Social Phobics Anonymous support group.
You just begin each meeting by having the support group take turns read from the books-- and all the knowledge is there!
These readings for the first 1/3 of the meeting time each week will provide all the needed information, social anxiety healing tips and wisdom to the support group (and you). As well as plently of topics of sharing for the rest of the meeting.
**If any one asks you a question you can't answer-- just encourage them to buy the books (and always encourage them keep to coming back to discuss what you are reading at the meeting!)
Information for ordering our recommended books is on the right side of our our web page at www.healsocialanxiety.com
7) A little more about the books--
The Emotions Anonymous and CODA (Codependents Anonymous) books explain how to use the 12 step program to recover from anxiety (the EA books are actually written for a all anxiety problems-- and the CODA book is written for Codependency which is a syndrom that involves patterns of worrying too much about what others think, p[utting the nneds of others beofre our own, assertiveness and boundary problems. The application of the 12 steps in these books all work together very well to specifically Social Anxiety as well).
Just substitute the words 'Social Anxiety' whenever you read the words 'anxiety' or 'codependency' in these books. Learning how to use the 12 Steps in these specific areas is a powerful key to learning how to overcome anxiety problems.
We also strongly recommend the book written by Rhonda Britton "Fearless Living: Live without excuses and love without regret."
This book contains very powerful yet surprisingly simple tools for healing fear and anxiety. They are different tools than those found in the OCA 12 Step book, yet they compliment the 12 steps very nicely. Both books go well together and have a wealth of information on how to overcome any phobia or anxiety problem. **We do not profit from the sale of these books.
